A Letter To Your Future Husband

Ladies, I have to say. This does not stand for everyone, but from my experience the majority of females In this generation are very much obliged to require a lot of things from the man, and seek consistent goodness from the man, but rarely every stop and think what they need to seek from a woman. Men can be some of the most fragile creatures, even though they may not seem that way. A man will always need a good woman to allow him to seek within her, what she seeks within him.

I'm only 20 years old, and am very much at an age where I am enjoying being on my own. Of course I can get lonely, but when those moments visit me I simply stop and smile and think "It's okay. You got you". I'm young, and I'm still on many missions within myself. Still learning to love, forgive, be patient, leverage emotionally and financially, learn, control my emotions, learn myself - the opportunities I have for growth are a blessing and also infinite for you all too.

I feel it is important to experience and learn love within yourself, so you are then able to know how to give it to someone else. I often always come across the same term, the famous "how are you going to love somebody else, if you don't love yourself?", and as repeated as it is, I can confirm it is true. If you don't have love for who you are, acceptance for who you are, love for your physical, your mental, your flaws, your positives, how can you love that of someone else? It's not to say you cannot love. It is simply to remind you, you are capable. A romantic relationship you are waiting for or currently without isn't ready for you yet, because you're not ready and the person who has been chosen for you may not be either. Once again, may I reiterate the fact that I am writing from experience, past or current.

Going back to my main subject, I was sat awake thinking how beautiful it would be for me to sit and write a letter to my future husband. I know what you're probably thinking...what in the world is this bitch on? I'll tell you. Part of me wanted to write this letter, to see how capable I am of showing the love I have, the type of love I have and how far I've come to want to express it and give it after being through so much heartache. Other parts of me wanted to write it, to actually keep and maybe one day give. I couldn't help but let my mind wander off into thinking about what a valuable memory it will be one day for me and my other half, to sit and read it one day.

Without further ado, here is my letter.

Dear future husband,

I’ve probably given you this piece of paper at our wedding, or in a moment that I feel it is most important to share, and at a time to create another valuable memory with you. I’m currently 20 years old, sat in my university bedroom thinking about you. Thinking about me, thinking about you. Thinking how beautiful it is to of reached this level of love with you, and within myself. Right now, I’m single. I’m broke. I’m exhausted. I’m listening to you Get You by Daniel Caesar at 11:51pm on Sunday night. I wonder what you’re up too.

It suddenly dawned on me that I wanted to write you a love letter. Within this love letter, is everything I am going to give to you, and everything I am going to give myself by giving to you. I’m dreaming of the day I meet you, and we are at a place where the simplest things make my heart so happy. Sitting on our porch, drinking our coffee on a Sunday morning, watching the sunrise. Leaning on your shoulder, feeling your warmth. Your stubble rubbing against my forehead as you reach down to kiss me.

Through the simple times, the simple things you love that make you happy, and the simple things I love that make me happy, please always remember that I will love you and be happy with you when times are not the simplest. When you need somebody’s shoulder to cry on, I will be here. When you need a woman to caress your soul and love you so deeply, unconditionally, I will be that woman. When you need me to hold your head in my chest, my chest will be here to hold you. When you need somebody to listen to your deepest, darkest thoughts, my ears will be here to listen and my mind will not judge. When you need to laugh, be silly, fool around, my inner child will be ready here to play with you. When you need me to ride for you, work with you, help you, advise you, by wisdom will greet you with a kiss. When you need to know that I will travel every extra mile for you, know that I’ll be ready and waiting to start that journey. When you need a woman to satisfy you, love you, make you feel worthy, beautiful, righteous, the king you are, I will be your Queen waiting next to your throne. When you need someone to understand your pain, remember you do not have to leave nor will I let you, until you feel secure and safe to let me heal with you. When you need someone to just sit comfortably in silence with, I’ll be there to sit with you. I will always be with you. I will always be here to give you exactly what you need. My love will not fail you. I will love you until the end of time, and I will adore you throughout everything. The simple things will be beautiful, but these moments of hardship, happiness, love, living, sadness, heartache, will write our chapter just like I have wrote this letter to you.

From this letter, I hope you can take away from it and feel enlightened about the types of things a woman is capable of offering a man that she loves. I've never been in a relationship, I've never been in love. I've had love for people, but I haven't been in love with somebody. I haven't had anybody in my life, in that way before. If i can be a student of love without experiencing it in this type of form, so can you.

By no means am I expressing the need to have a man. If you know me, you know that, that is the last thing I would advise any woman.

I have written and published this, not for the mere attention of appreciation from others, but for the sake of myself; to feel the freedom of being able to finally express my voice as loud as I like on matters that I feel are beautiful to share and write about. For the sake of myself, to see the growth within myself. Some of these things others may keep private, and of course none of you know what type of written things I keep private, or even things in general I keep private. But I feel it's important for more people to embrace the scary, use your voice, say what you want, express how you want too, however you need too. Don't be afraid of your voice. Love your voice, learn your voice.